COMPOST (#015) – Burdigala Records

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Straight outa Bordeaux France (home of wine and probably other things too), this is the Bordal Fest compilation. Bordal Fest being some kind of concert series celebrating the partnership between Burdigala Records and something called Picole. I don’t know what any of this means for either party, but I do know it means a pretty sick comp full of squeaky-clean pop punk for our enjoyment. Any one of these bands could be very much at home on Fat Wreck Chords, and no, I don’t mean that as an insult. I see how it could be perceived as one though. All I’m saying is this stuff really appeals to the 15 year old skater-punk in me, and it should appeal to the one in you too. If you don’t have a 15 year old skater-punk in you.. You know what, I’m gonna stop myself right there. Have a nice day folks.

From the DEMONSTRATION DEPARTMENT – Sicayda

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Another demo that’s more of an EP than most of the EP’s I come across. In the spirit of punk rock, I personally think it’s acceptable to put out your first ever recording session, no matter how awful, as an EP with an awesome title. That’s just me. Not everyone feels that way. I get it, but to call something this good a demo, to me just feels so…professional. And if you’ve read my blog, you know professionalism is not something I strive towards, or even condone really. Having said that, this here demo is easily the most dopest thing I’ve heard out of my homeland in months. Oof! These songs sound like when you dump a garbage can full of hockey pucks into a bigger garbage can full of guitars. You know when you do that? And then you figure skate to it? Exactly.

Doesn’t English (#016) – побег

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I have no idea what this band is even called. In their bandcamp URL they’re called Pobeg but on the bandcamp page itself they’re called побег. If that doesn’t confuse you enough, the name on the album art appears to be Jiosez. Typical Russian confusion tactics am I right? Pobeg, I think, is the english alphabet spelling of побег, which means “the escape”. Don’t quote me on any of this please. I’m very confused (in general but also about this band). At least there’s no confusion about how freakin’ rad this release is. If I were to transcribe this into colours, the lyrics would be grey or brown and the music itself would be purple with sharp bursts of pink and red. What, you don’t hear colours? I hear the rainbow y’all. This is so good. Track 2, oof! I love it so much.

Top 5 Albums/EP’s That DON’T Suck [AUGUST 2018]

crown poochedCrown – Pooched
Man these are some fuzzy little numbers. Very dog-centric songwriting here, and dogs are also fuzzy so my fuzz meter is really chirping right now. I wont attribute the awesomeness of this album to something in the water in Victoria because I’ve had the water in Victoria and there is nothing in it. It’s just water. There is something in the air though. Seagulls! A lot of marijuana smoke too probably. This is actually my favourite release this month and I have surprisingly little to say about it. Umm, lets see.. Well have you seen the album art? It has dogs on it and I think one of them is eating an ice cream cone. There might also be a gaint octopus creature eating an ice cream cone. I can’t be too sure. All four songs clock in at less than 7 minutes, so realistically, you could probably finish this thing off while your sweet and sour meatballs are cooking. I literally just Googled “what takes 7 minutes to cook”.    Listen on Bandcamp

kaleb burnKaleb – Burn
I went to highschool with a Kaleb. He wasn’t the brightest knife in the shed that Kaleb. I think he was a year older than me and I graduated before him. That was the year the 90’s ended, and so we said goodbye to a decade of crucial bands and said hello to Smashmouth. Smashmouth is one word right? Hey whoever came up with the name of that band, we all owe you a high five dude. Actually, in all honesty, the early 2000’s were full of incredible bands that I was too busy listening to Tupac to notice at the time. The 90’s were quite likely the better decade though, and this band Kaleb seems to be aware of that. I can easily imagine a weird artsy early 90’s music video set to this music. Lots of long hair in the video too. Lots!    Listen on Bandcamp

roseate wiltawayRoseate – Wiltaway
I had to Google the definition of Roseate just to get the phonetic spelling, so I could pronounce this band. I consider myself a bit of a wordsmith, but I’ve never heard of that word and, in truth, I do not like it. It’s stupid and I hate it, and I wouldn’t be caught dead using it in a sentence. Be that as it may, this band is a disturbance of wonderment that can not be measured. I think they could very well be the true path to peace on earth. It may be roseate of me to say so, but I’m sure there is something supernatural about these sounds. They cast a warm roseate light upon me as I sit here listening. In all conscience, you would have to be a horrible leprechaun of a person to not love this. I just wish they hadn’t given themselves such a stupid sucky name that feels awful in my mouth.    Listen on Bandcamp

tracy soto self titledTracy Soto – Self Titled
I would say this band was following in the footsteps of Inland Empire forefathers like Falling Sickness and The Voodoo Glow Skulls, but they’re not. They’re from Riverside CA and they’re not a ska punk band. Propgandhi was wrong in 1993 when they said “ska sucks” but, ex post facto, they were 100% correct. In other words, ska punk was cool in the 90’s. It is not cool anymore. It has not aged well. You have to grow out of it eventually like you would Weird Al or, well, Propagandhi. Actually that’s a bad example cuz I think I would respect the hell of someone if they were still a hardcore Weird Al fan in their mid 30’s. Anyway, yeah, no ska punk here whatsoever. We’ve got a mixed bucket of punk rock n roll with some indie punk sloshed around in there with some ice and someone’s foot cuz it hot in Southern California godammit! Ska punk bands, please stop. Do something like Tracy Soto is doing instead. It’s ok. It’s ok. Shhhhh shhhh. Let it go. Just let it go. It’s time. Shhh. Put that trumpet down. Uh uh. No. Shhhh. It’s ok.    Listen on Bandcamp

4brothers self titled4Brothers – Self Titled
Wow this is a treat for your ears folks. So many fun things are going to come through your headphones when you click play on this. It’s undeniably pleasing to listen to. Yes, it’s poppier than, uhhh what’s poppy? Popcorn? Wow. Yes and probably too poppy in fact, but holy hell I can’t get enough. I don’t feel guilty about it either. I’m not ashamed! Now it’s time for me to make an unfair association, based on gender and geography. 4Brothers is kind of like a 90’s band called Cigaretteman because they were both catchy pop punk bands with male/female vocals from Japan. The similarities don’t go any further than that. They sound nothing alike. Hey why is this band called 4Brothers though when one of the members is clearly a girl? Great, now I’m assuming genders. Maybe it’s a dude with a really angelic voice. I don’t know ok. Andre 3000 was great in that Four Brothers movie wasn’t he? Why isn’t he in more movies? Remember when DMX was making movies? Hahahahahaha oh wow. Those were bad. Ok I’m done here.    Listen on Bandcamp

ENDNOTES:
Hey thanks for reading. I hope you found something you liked. I’m trying to make this your favourite new music resource. This is where you’re going to find the weird bands you’ve never heard of. The ones hiding deep inside the internet that your algorithms can’t locate. Please tell your friends and stay tuned! You never know what I might dig up next. Also, be sure to check out the Scrap Heap for loads of great bands that didn’t make the top five. Ok bye! [These endnotes are a complete copypasta of last months endnotes because I just ran out of time this month and I have to get this thing posted!]

From the MOST INTERESTING SONG TITLES DEPARTMENT – Here are some recent discoveries:

awake by noon i hope youre okbinary commit more arsonbret rewalt adjectivecar spiders the luxury of silencecurrently in these united statesdeath cow slow drownhe was an artist he was a carpenter treat you wellhoney be well these emo kids and their damn polaroidshouseparty keep it simplejeffrey lewis works by tuli kupferberglatterman turn up the punk well be singinglife hacks awful man splitnow what if you lived here youd be home by nowoxford dwellingpaper rosesparty fridge all these songs are happy songspour me another pour purerileyshark party chumsmalltime vault the fury beneath the love

“Be Worry. Don’t Happy”
“I Went Somewhere And All I Got Was Something”
“I Wanna Hold Your Foot”
“B​.​Y​.​O​.​T. (Bring Your Own Tears)”
“I Seriously Wrote This One To Apologize To My Girlfriend After A Fight We Had In Which She Was 100% Correct and I Was 100% In The Wrong”
“Defender Of Lame Things”
“Yes, I Said You Were Dead. And Yes, I Used The F Word”
“Poison Your Boss”
“Kevin James Needs To See A Doctor”
“(That’s What) She Said Don’t”
“There’s No Problem You Can’t Handle By Running Away”
“Urethra Fork (the point where I start to judge​.​.​.​)”
“Fuck Me I Love Death Metal”
“Get Your Friends Together (To Commit Arson) (The Arson Song)”
“Space Jam 2: The Jam Spaces You”
“Ned Flanders Fields”
“I’ll Backhand The Fuck Out Of A Seagull”
“Around Here We Mourn Our Young”
“We Can’t Stop Here, This Is Rat Country”
“Ted Cruz Was The Zodiac Killer”
“I Have Mixed Drinks About My Feelings”
“God Released Me into the Wild and Now He’s Hunting Me for Sport”
“The Cheap Groceries On The Bottom Shelf Taste The Same As The Leading Brand”
“The All New iPhone 666”

Doesn’t English (#015) – Bonjour Machines

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Whoever said mathy emo doesn’t sound good in Hebrew was a liar! What? Nobody ever said that? Well they better not have, otherwise they’re going to feel pretty stupid when they listen to this. Holy crap! Straight out of Tel Aviv Israel (home of arid weather) this is Bonjour Machines, which I can translate for you because I speak French. It means “Hello Machines”! Are they saying hello to the machines or are they, themselves, machines that say “hello”? That is the quandary that is this band. If you dare to attempt this riddle you will first need to subject yourself to an ear-pummeling of rad tunes with extra chutzpah! Either I’m adorably ignorant or I’ve just offended an entire nation. It’s a risk I often find myself having to take. Anyhow, this is a fairly unsucky album.

 

Top 5 Albums/EP’s That DON’T Suck [JULY 2018]

vacant company decolonizeVacant Company – Decolonize
Ok every hardcore band currently in existence, I’m afraid I have some bad news for you. The bad news is called Vacant Company. Unfortunately for you they have raised the bar just a tad. You’re all going to have to regroup and come up with something better now. Hey, that’s just the way it goes. Sometimes you get schooled. Let this be a lesson to you. Your best bet is to study this album, listen to it day in and day out; While you make breakfast, while you drive in your car, and while you sleep at night. Then try to (and good fucking luck with this) come up with something of your own that is on the same level. It’s not your fault this band is just trailblazing your asses, but that’s the reality you now have to live with. Don’t be discouraged. Don’t give up. You can do this. I believe in you some of you a small a very small few of you.   Listen on Bandcamp

dim it feels like homeDim – It Feels Like Home
The lessons just keep on coming don’t they? Here you go fledgling screamo bands, this is your homework. Listen to it a lot. Commit it to memory. Take careful notes and practice practice practice. Maybe someday you yourself will put out something this goddamn brilliant. I’m not going to sugar coat this for you. You probably do suck a lot, but maybe, just maybe you have what it takes. And by ‘what it takes’ I mean Dim. Dim the band, not the mental misalignment or lack of lighting. Is this emo at it’s screamiest? No, it is not. Is it Screamo at it’s emoiest? I don’t think so. This is what you call warm porridge. What a stupid word porridge is. Porridge. Say it, porridge. It’s starting to sound like a Descendents song. Wait, Is that a Descendents song?    Listen on Bandcamp or Spotify

bad shapes rough edges epBad Shapes – Rough Edges
Incredible lyrics go a long way towards making me love a band. I’ll even forgive some pretty awful musicianship in lieu of some quality wordsmithery. This album is not an example of that. This is one of those scattered-chance situations where you have both worlds colliding like two sides of a zipper, thus closing the jacket of perfection.. What in holy hell am I typing right now? Sorry about that. I thought I had something. You get the idea though right? This is a really good little EP. Actually it’s not that little; these are some pretty hefty songs. One of them has what appears (can things appear sonically?) to be voice clips of alien encounter anecdotes. I mean damn. I bet aliens can appear sonically. If you live in Philadelphia you would be remiss to not see this band play live. I’m jealous that you even have the opportunity to do so. I can sense how mind-blasting this would be in person. Listen, you’re just a fool if you don’t go to their next show pal. Unless it’s on a weeknight. If it’s on a weeknight you should probably just stay home and get to bed at a decent time. I’m ok with that.   Listen on Bandcamp

special moves julySpecial Moves – July
I don’t know about you, but I like my lo-fi vocals super fuzzy and extra squealy. No, seriously I do. It’s Frederic Chopin to my ears. I heard an interview with Vinnie Stigma on Turned Out A Punk once and he was talking about how punk rock made him a lover of awful vocals, and how he often judges a band by how crappy the singer is. The worse the voice the better. I tend to operate under that same logic. Don’t get me wrong, I love the voices of people like Lauryn Hill and Percy Sledge, but I’ll take Ron Reyes or Milo Aukerman all day over some pretty singer. Adele can go to uh-hell! Anyway, so if the singer for Special Moves is reading this right now, he’s either nodding his head in agreement, or he’s just had an awakening from years of denial. Sorry pal, your voice is trash, and by trash I mean solid gold! Everyone should support Reflective Tapes by the way. They’re putting out so many rad cassettes. Get this and put it in your ghetto blaster.   Listen on Bandcamp

way no bueno self titledWay No Bueno – Self Titled
If punk rock is an aquarium (and I’m almost certain it is), then these lads are the catfish. I’m not trying to imply that Way No Bueno are a bottom feeding band by the way. I just mean their music sounds a lot like how catfish probably tastes. I’ve never actually had the privilege of eating a catfish (I live in salmon country) but I’m assuming it’s as sweet and tender as these tunes are. A little bit greasy too, but hey, grease has important vitamins in it. I’m pretty sure it’s high in vitamin L. There’s no need to fact-check me on this. Haha relax, I know what I’m talking about. Isn’t it weird how British people say ‘vitamin’? There’s that one Big Audio Dynamite song where Mickey Jones keeps saying “Gimme another hit of vitimin C” over and over. Like he says it about 400 times in that song and by the end of it you’re almost convinced that maybe you should start pronouncing it that way. Almost, but then you remember Mick Jones was kicked out of the Clash for a reason; He was a mole for the Queen. Again, no fact-checking please.   Listen on Bandcamp

ENDNOTES:
Hey thanks for reading. I hope you found something you liked. I’m trying to make this your favourite new music resource. This is where you’re going to find the weird bands you’ve never heard of. The ones hiding deep inside the internet that your algorithms can’t locate. Please tell your friends and stay tuned! You never know what I might dig up next. Also, be sure to check out the Scrap Heap for loads of great bands that didn’t make the top five. Ok bye!
-Steve Doesnt

COMPOST (#014) – Open Door Records

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My personal feelings about children are generally negative. I mean I do not like them very much, but the thought of them being mistreated infuriates me to no end. If you feel the same way you should contribute to one of the organizations helping the kids at the border. Better yet, you can purchase this wicked comp from Open Door Records, and the proceeds will be donated to the cause. I mean you help kids and you get a bunch of cool tunes. Sounds like a solid plan to me. It’s unfortunate that such a comp even has to exist but let’s not get me started on a political tirade right now. Just go get this thing. It’s full of squeaky-clean pop punk, emo, some screaming, a bit of funk(?), and some other stuff. Whatever, it’s mostly/partially good. The Smilies are on here but their best song is not. Are you sold yet? I know I’m making this sound incredible.